Tatiana Parafiniuk-Talesnick grew up in the United States in a Mexican neighborhood. Her stepfather is Costa Rican and her mother is a U.S. citizen.

When Tatiana was five, she was baptized in a Catholic church in Costa Rica. She and her mom were the only English-speaking, White people in attendance.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick’s mother married her stepdad when she was three. Her stepfather is an immigrant from Heredia, Costa Rica. The two met in a foreign exchange worker program in the United States

Later, the family moved into a Mexican neighborhood in Denver, Colo., USA. The family assimilated to the Mexican culture in the neighborhood, but “something wasn’t quite right” compared to her stepfather’s Costa Rican culture along with her mom’s U.S. culture, Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

“The foods weren’t always quite right and the phrases weren’t quite right but you just kinda adapt,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick’s stepdad experienced racism he was not accustomed to in Costa Rica. In his home country, he was considered to have light skin and belonged to the middle class. In the United States, he was fired from his job for having an accent and faced economic hardships common to other immigrants, especially immigrants of color.

“It did provide me a lot of perspective growing up that way,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick often distances herself from white U.S. culture.

“There’s a vacancy in white American culture,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said. “You have to check your food, dances and customs at the door to fit in.”

Although she had a tumultuous relationship her stepdad due to his abusive behavior toward the family, she embraced the culture.

You have to check your food, dances and customs at the door to fit in.

Despite her stepdad inconsistently lived with the family, they embraced the culture of the neighborhood. They attended a Spanish-speaking church, often getting paletas after church or visiting the panaderia. There was always one rule: you had to order in Spanish.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick’s mother always encouraged an open-minded attitude. She believed that you can’t expect people to be like you, you have to get on their level.

Language use

Once when the family was at the laundry, Parafiniuk-Talesnick wanted to watch cartoons. Her mom insisted that she ask in Spanish, even though she was nervous and embarrassed of her accent and her grasp of the language.

“She would have been mortified if I had asked in English,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick attended school in a middle class, predominately white suburb because education was more valued. She often felt like a traitor to her local school, but education couldn’t be their first priority because of other societal issues they had to face.

“We did have the privilege of going into mostly white spaces,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

While in school, she befriended mostly Latinas because she could relate to them.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick would tell people when she was younger that she was “white but basically Latina,” she said. Now, she knows it’s a problematic thing to say because she does have inherent privilege from her white status.

“It was weird to just pop up into white suburbia and look like white suburbia,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said. “It continues to always take a moment. Eventually people get it because I care about the things I care about and I know about the things I know about.”

It was weird to just pop up into white suburbia and look like white suburbia.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick was on the cheer team on her high school, was an International Baccalaureate student and attended debutants financed by her wealthy grandparents.

“The places I pop up and appear to fit in I don’t fit in,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

Different experience growing up

From visiting Costa Rica and attending school there to picking rotten mangoes in her tía’s backyard, Parafiniuk-Talesnick felt her experience growing up was different from her peers.

“Understanding cultural differences was huge for me,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said. “I had a little something different going on.”

Although this does give her a unique view of the world, she often feels like she doesn’t completely fit in with one culture. In the United States, emphasis is placed on visual diversity.

“It’s frustrating because I am white and I am Latina but I don’t feel like I fully fit into either,” said Randi Mattox, a U.S. Latina who passes as white.

Hidden diversity

Those who have hidden diversity often feel they do not belong in either culture.

“It leaves me in this borderland of OK I get this and I get that,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said. “If someone took my blood it wouldn’t tell you anything about my childhood.”

Once Parafiniuk-Talesnick went to high school, she became angry at her stepdad for his abusive behavior. She questioned if she belonged in his Costa Rican culture.

Now, she uses her cross-cultural, intercultural background to affect social change. She is studying journalism and women’s studies and is the managing editor of a newspaper.

Growing up biracial, bicultural

“Growing up in a biracial, bicultural household that was also an abusive household quickstarted me to a place where I’m at in my life and I can’t imagine thinking or studying anything else,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

She has personally experienced the problems with race in the United States. She saw the predatory loans given out to immigrant and Latino families, including her own. She also saw the racism and classism in her neighborhood.

“I was always on this path for justice for people,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick’s inclusion within the dominant U.S. culture gives her a greater ability to affect change. Her cross-cultural background inspires her to make that change. Many others share that experience.

“I have the frame of reference to see these issues but I have the privilege to ignore them,” Mattox said.

Parafiniuk-Talesnick is working on inequalities and diversity within the newspaper she works for. She hopes to use people’s talents for social justice. She aims to serve all members of the community and combat the notion that the dominate voice in journalism is not the objective one.

“I’ve been working really hard to have a more diverse voice, more robust coverage and a more accessible community,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said.

For Parafiniuk-Talesnick, her life has led her to do this work.

“My social justice is rooted deeply in experience and not in random well intentions,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick. “I’ve been pushed and pulled and molded to do this work. There’s nothing else for me.”

Impact of different cultures

For Parafiniuk-Talesnick, her life has been distinctively touched by different cultures.

“I’ve never wanted to claim an identity falsely but it’s also weird when I get categorized with white people,” Parafiniuk-Talesnick said. “It’s not been my experience. I have the privilege and ability to dance between.”

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